#I wish I was a good person

6 messages · Page 1 of 1 (latest)

latent saffron
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I'm scared of losing a friend I've had for a year because they just disappeared mid-conversation while I was venting my frustrations at my inability to find a job I could actually apply for. I was scared I had said something wrong so I asked her if she was alright, and when she returned she was super confused. Great. I was overthinking. So I explain my thought process (she is fully aware that I get scared I've upset someone when they disappear suddenly like that, it's happened before with other people) and she says that she had to take a break and then spoke to someone else when she returned because she was upset that she couldn't help me (so I upset her badly enough for her to disappear, asshole move on my behalf). Then she disappears again and I panic again because this time she has a text somewhere saying [TW] ||Kms😹😹😹I should've kept my mouth shut!!|| And goes silent for twelve hours. At around ten hours of silence (At 3am), after multiple breakdowns and panic attacks, I freak out and outwardly vent my frustrations at how shitty I am somewhere that she ends up seeing (which wasn't my plan, I was blindly panicking that I've lost my sixth or seventh friend this way). She then proceeds to yell at me through text in a way that shows me she's incredibly upset. Why can't I do the right thing for once? What the hell is wrong with me?

velvet palm
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My guy, there is nothing wrong with you...

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You venting like that is totally okay, however, there should always be a few things to lookout for before venting

velvet palm
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  • If you're venting, and they don't seem to care, or possibly don't want you to vent, don't vent, they're not the person for it
latent saffron
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They always encourage me to vent, even this time