#TW: Suicide, probably more idk how much ima put

11 messages · Page 1 of 1 (latest)

stark crane
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On April 21st 2024, I had tried to commit suicide, I failed, obviously, because I was a miserable weak 13 year old. Since then, I have been generally getting better, with bad periods generally only lasting a day. But now, over a year later, I’ve returned to a point where I’m considering attempting to kms again. Usually these period last about a day as I said but I’ve been feeling like this for a week. I would usually rely on my friend but he broke his phone in the dumbest way and we cannot talk outside of school, I’m currently waiting on a verdict from the NHS on whether I should get therapy but when I had my appointment with them was directly before I started this spiral so it’s possible I don’t even get the help I need. I’ve also always felt like a deformity, like a mistake bc of my sexuality, since I found out I was gay when I was 9. I’ve always hated myself and my horrible fucking life and the shitty twats in the Catholic school I go to. I’ve been religious my whole life but even a lot of people of my own faith would fucking hate me over a misunderstanding which they use to spin us as bad people. I’ce always hated my sexuality, my body, my face, my everything. Ive had to find out that shit that I do isn’t normal. I’m underweight as fuck but my stomach doesn’t feel feminine enough so I keep on skipping meals. I convinced myself that I was straight or bisexual and asked out a fucking girl so I wouldn’t have to face being a gay person in a Catholic school. I’ve been doing self harm since I was 6-7 (albeit not really serious back then) I don’t fucking know. I don’t know if I can do this fucking shit any longer

short sable
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i have a question, in what year of school are you currently

thorn pumice
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Hey don’t commit you matter try contacting chams or the voice ect and if you are about to commit please call smaritans (116-113 I think) and get some help you shouldn’t have to want to commit no human ever should because we all matter

azure dagger
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Love ya

stark crane
thorn pumice
stark crane
thorn pumice
stark crane
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I zone out and distract myself

thorn pumice
obtuse obsidian
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I want to kill myself too. Even tried to split my skull apart.