I have an obsession with my own blood

[burnt holly]

I just cut myself because I needed to see the blood run down my arm, I have a weird fascination about it, and I feel like I can't relax without it, it's driving me mad and my mom is gonna be pissed when she sees it, Im probably gonna end up in the mental hospital again and possibly a residential, I need advice and help

[outer bridge]

Could you like maybe squeeze a tomato against your arm to replicate blood.
Or maybe red food coloring and water mixed and pour it down.
I have something kinda similar I pick scabs and enjoy seeing my own blood or tasting it.
I would advise maybe not cutting but to lessen the danger pick with like your nails.
Or do the blood replacement as I previously suggested.

[burnt holly]

I already pick my nails and they bleed a lot

I can try the blood replacement suggestion tho

But now I regret cutting, my arm hurts and the dopamine rush is gone