I found a boy very cute and attractive in our school. I eventually asked him to be friends, and we became friends, but the feelings I had for him grew stronger. He was an amazing person in my eyes. He would also be an amazing boyfriend for me too, I thought. So i eventually confessed, he was very embarrassed but said he kind of felt the same for me. I was a little uncertain, but I didnt know why. From then on, we would cuddle, he would even step out of his comfort zone for me. He would call me beautiful, and he reassured me that i was attractive. He would even ask me if he was pushing boundaries, if it was okay to me, and yes it was all going well. To me, he was the most handsome and cute boy out here.He really must have been committed to being a good boyfriend for me. But yesterday, I asked him if he thought I was cute too. He wasnt necessarily comfortable with that, but i felt myself go cold and text him "so yoh dont think im cute?" He said "yes you are cute" but I was afraid that i made him say that out of fear. And I did. He doesn't think im cute. I told him I wouldn't be mad, but I got mad. And I dont know why I lied to him. I dont know WHY I got mad, necessarily. We both lied to each other in a sense.
He was attracted to me for my personality, not my looks. But for some reason, I desire both. And I don't know why him loving me for me wasnt enough. My dad said that it was because he liked me, but he just didn't like me romantically too much.
#We weren't meant to be
tired parrot
Hey, I need to tell you something.
Im sorry, I should not have pressured you into answering something you were not comfortable with. Honestly, I really never saw it coming. I didn't think i would ever do something like that, but at the moment, instead of letting my logic step in, my fear controlled me and I just typed away. That was basically the whole moment yesterday.
I know I said I wouldn't be mad, and I didnt think I would be until it happened. I felt a lot of disappointment (it isnt your fault)
And i started to doubt anything you've ever said about my appearance. I guess I was really insecure, after all. Not ready for a relationship.
But from our interaction, it seems like you liked me, but you weren't necessarily attracted to me. Im very honored that you loved me for my personality, and for some reason, that isnt enough. I guess i just desire someone who thinks im beautiful inside and outside. And its okay that you didnt meet that need, its not your fault. I honestly think youre an awesome person who cares about the people around him. But yesterday, we were irrational. And im sorry I ever did that to you. Just try not to overthink this, you're not the only one that messed up, in fact, it was me who made the first mistake.
I hope that one day, ill grow up enough to understand someone's boundaries better, and act more maturely about things.