Everything feels like it's collapsing around me. I don't have anywhere or anyone who can accept me irl, so I've been on Discord a lot. But now, during what has already been a terrible week, the server I felt most comfortable in has changed. Servers that have a more open policy with moderation always bother me, and this one has suddenly switched to that system. So many people I knew were getting banned for extremely minor things publicly so I left. I told my friends it was because I was going to be busy for a while and didn't want to be tempted to check Discord, but that was a lie. Some of 5hose friends are the mods in question. In fact, I was probably the only regularly active person who wasn't a mod. I definitely am now that so many people were banned. I've left and rejoined this server so many times lately, and I feel like I need it, but being there now just makes me so uncomfortable.
#It's all just too much
dry moon
desert steeple
Sorry to read that, i hope the circumstances get better. Not feeling accepted can be a difficult thing to have to experience.
dry moon
It's not even that. I just feel so fragile. Like everything minor makes me completely lose it.
dry moon
Update: I rejoined like 2 hours after this, deciding to just be less active there, but left again for good this time. Some things were said, definitely not meant to exclude, it was probably for inclusion in some twisted way, but I certainly will never feel welcome there again.