I’ll give you 10 minutes to convince me. TW: SH

[main bloom]

I want to SH, and it’s definitely the sadistic part of me, but I’ll give 10 minutes after the first comment to convince me not to do it.

[sharp marsh]

why

[main bloom]

And the timer starts.

[sharp marsh]

what counts as "convincing" exactly

[main bloom]

10 minutes starts now.

Get me to decide not to cut myself.

[sharp marsh]

you know those urges cant be ridden away in ten minutes

[main bloom]

Well, I’ve helped people back from wanting to k1ll themselves in less time.

[whole ice]

Because youre awesome at it.

[main bloom]

Well, hello there, darling! Decided to join the show?

[whole ice]

...yeah...

[sharp marsh]

i have done this type of thing before and it did not end well. that anything? :/

like very not well

[main bloom]

Then… enlist the help of other people. I could give you a 10 minute time extension.

[sharp marsh]

id love to do that but i dont know many other people.

whats gotten you here anyway?

[main bloom]

You could always make a post asking for help.

[molten socket]

Why do you even want to be convinced under only 10 minutes?

[jade kraken]

i have a friend who tried. i helped him sometimes by just being there. we didnt talk or anything i was just there. he is still here today because of that

[main bloom]

I already cut myself once today. I decided I might as well play a game for the second time.

[main bloom]

I thought it would be fun.

[molten socket]

Its not

[main bloom]

That’s nice. I’m sure you’re great to your friend! I tried one week ago. The only thing that saved me was not taking enough meds.

[main bloom]

It depends on who you ask.

[whole ice]

I tried to help....

[sharp marsh]

its not fun but for the sake of trying ill say it is

[patent rain]

For real, i almost lost an arm trying to ~just~ self harm. Dont do anything, go listen to some uplifting songs, if its day there go out, see the nature and cry

[main bloom]

I know you did, darling. But suicida1 thoughts are very overpowering.

[main bloom]

I’ve been listening to songs this whole time, and it’s night.

[main bloom]

I’m sure you don’t think this is, but my head isn’t screwed on straight right now.

[sharp marsh]

i can tell

[molten socket]

I can only help you if you help me, self harm thoughts actions can’t be cured under 10 minutes

[main bloom]

Yes, this isn’t “me” is it?

[patent rain]

And i guess u dont want to lose a limb

[sharp marsh]

no it very much is

[main bloom]

I offered a 10 minute time extension. I can up it to 20 if you want.

[main bloom]

Well, I wash off the blade and don’t use rusted ones,

[main bloom]

This is “me”?

[sharp marsh]

i mean, its not very surprising to be honest

[patent rain]

Lets be clear, be honest: what was the point of creating this if you pretty much have your decision? Do you think you can be helped?

[main bloom]

And you say that because?

[sharp marsh]

i can see myself in you

[molten socket]

Yeah like do you even want help?

[main bloom]

Yes, if efficiency is made.

[patent rain]

So did i… but i kept going and going till it was too deep

[main bloom]

10 minutes is up, would you guys want a 20 minute time extension?

[sharp marsh]

might as well

[whole ice]

Yes....

[patent rain]

Idk who you are, if youre fr but im gonna decide you are fr. Do you have anyone u love?

[main bloom]

Look above the message.

[patent rain]

You seem to be ignoring them

[main bloom]

I’ve responded to them every chance.

And talked with them before this.

[whole ice]

No im just not helping enough...

[main bloom]

STARLIGHT

I WILL NOT TOLERATE THAT!

[molten socket]

Why are you doing SH?

[main bloom]

You are helping enough!

[main bloom]

I relapsed after 3 years, and I want more.

[sharp marsh]

i know why youre doing this. ive done it before. it wont work. ever. all that will happen is that you will end up worse than before

[main bloom]

Then why am I doing this?

[sharp marsh]

for attention

[main bloom]

No, actually.

[whole ice]

Take it back right now.

[molten socket]

Have you talked to a therapist or counselor about this?

[sharp marsh]

i will

[main bloom]

They know. didn’t talk to them about this before though.

[patent rain]

To feel the pain physically

[main bloom]

That is part of it I suppose.

[patent rain]

But also is the attention

[main bloom]

You will take it back, or…

[main bloom]

No.

[whole ice]

Take it back.

[sharp marsh]

ill take it back

[main bloom]

Okay.

[sharp marsh]

good chance youre doing it just for the fun of it

for the rush

[main bloom]

Which part of this?

[sharp marsh]

i guess all of it

or at least the gamey part

[molten socket]

because the 10-20 minutes deadline makes no sense, if you actually SH and seek help it’d need more than 20 minutes for that

[main bloom]

The cutting, not for fun. Making this post, It’s pure sadistic fun.

[main bloom]

I am looking for help though.

[sharp marsh]

there are too many potential reasons to sh

[patent rain]

Its all part… The self hate, taking your pain into physical pain, the attention that you need but not the ones u have, the ones u crave. You have everything not to hurt yourself and yet you will? Bc you have friends, you have therapy and u have randoms tryna help

[molten socket]

Yeah but only 20 minutes won’t work

You need to give us more time

[sharp marsh]

put down whatever object youre using

[patent rain]

You need to give yourself time

[main bloom]

Hey, ask the people on here why they feel bad. You’ll get the same answer.

I haven’t started the 20 minute btw.

[sharp marsh]

you feel disillusioned with it all. why not make a game of it? turn your suffering into a show?

[patent rain]

Do u feel like in 20 min we can help?

[main bloom]

Dang, I accidentally cut my tongue…

That hurt…

[main bloom]

Yeah!

[patent rain]

Are u under any substance

[main bloom]

Nope!

[sharp marsh]

what do you want me to do

to plead? beg?

[main bloom]

That’s all up to you.

[patent rain]

Drop whatever the fuck ure holding

Shower

[main bloom]

Okay, so nothing dropped.

Shower???

[sharp marsh]

what fun is a game if its just talking

[weak vessel]

Please don’t @main bloom

[patent rain]

Ok then you just want the attention bc if u wanted help ud be willing to listen

[main bloom]

Seeing the reactions the players give.

[main bloom]

What?

I thought you meant what I was holding.

[whole ice]

Thats not how it works

[fringe creek]

@main bloom please don’t do anything
Let me help you like you helped me several times

[main bloom]

I mean, timer not started.

Everyone can go ahead.

[weak vessel]

You help so many people, and without you they’d most likely be gone, the people you help will help you, you’ve helped me a lot, and now it’s my turn to help you.

[main bloom]

Okay, my tongue is better.

[whole ice]

Good

[weak vessel]

SH will only bring you more suffering, it won’t help. People will tell you bad things, that doesn’t mean to hurt yourself when their words hurt you, it only hurts you more.

[sharp marsh]

do you get enjoyment out of this? be honest

[main bloom]

Which part?

[sharp marsh]

true

[main bloom]

Okay, but which part?

[sharp marsh]

nevermind the question

[main bloom]

Okay.

Anything else before I start the timer?

[sharp marsh]

im leaving

[main bloom]

Yeah. You can go.

[weak vessel]

Please don’t SH. It only will break you even more.

[main bloom]

You can leave if you want to. I know nobody wants to be around me right now.

Nobody should…

[weak vessel]

I want to stay and help you, You’ve helped me, and it’s my turn now.

[main bloom]

What am I?

[main bloom]

Right, sorry. Thanks.

[weak vessel]

You don’t have to be sorry

It’s okay

I care about you, and I don’t want you to hurt yourself

[main bloom]

Why? I’m just attention seeking.

Nobody really does this.

I’m just an idiot,

[weak vessel]

You’re not an idiot

People do this sometimes

[fossil creek]

No. You’re not. I just read everything and it’s not attention seeking. It’s trying to seek pleasure out of pain, or so it seems

[fringe creek]

You are not a fucking idiot
You are an amazing person
You deserve this help

[weak vessel]

You’re seeking help for your problem

[main bloom]

Why would I deserve help after turning a serious matter into a game show?

[fossil creek]

But this sadistic pleasure or whatever won’t over rule the pain sh will bring.

[fossil creek]

Because no matter what you or anyone else does, every deserves help.

[weak vessel]

You’re trying to give us time before you do it and that time is for us to convince you, it’s not a gameshow, it’s your way of getting help

[fossil creek]

You’re going through something awful and no matter how you react, you still deserve help

[weak vessel]

exactly

[fringe creek]

Because everyone deserves a chance at being helped
No matter what they’ve done

[main bloom]

As much as I would like to agree, I don’t think I deserve anything good. I make a joke out of self harm. I act like it’s a game. I literally sent a invite to people I had DMs with. I just can’t be serious for fucking once can I?! I can’t be a good person for once!

[fossil creek]

What you do in a moment of crisis doesn’t dictate your worth or what you deserve!

[weak vessel]

You are a good person, you’ve helped almost everyone on here.

[fossil creek]

You still deserve help and good things

[weak vessel]

You deserve this help, you deserve good things in life, you deserve a happier life.

[fringe creek]

You are a good person!
In fact you’re a great person!
You deserve all the help you can be given
Just because you’ve turned this into a game and you’re making a joke out of self harm doesn’t mean you don’t deserve the help
this is a time if crisis, you need help more than ever now
If you did something to yourself I would never forgive myself
You’ve done so much for me and I’ve done so little for you
I would sacrifice my life if it saved yours

[main bloom]

I doubt someone could like me that much…

Oops, wrong reply.

Sorry, Kai.

[fringe creek]

You mean everything to me
You helped me so much through my crisis
So I want to be able to help you

Please if you need to talk about anything, dm me
I’m always here for you, even if you don’t see or know I am

[main bloom]

I could go back to the sadistic host if you guys want. I don’t know.

[weak vessel]

I’m here too @main bloom

[weak vessel]

What host? This isn’t a gameshow. You didn’ t turn this into a gameshow, you’re trying to get as mush help as you can before you do SH.

[main bloom]

I just don’t know what to do. I’ve never experienced this kind of support.

[fossil creek]

Don’t, its good to hear and see what you’re feeling. Keep expressing your genuine feelings and we will keep helping and supporting you

[main bloom]

To put it better, the fake mask I put on to get a sick pleasure out of it so I don’t think about what’s currently happening.

[fossil creek]

You don’t have to do anything besides be honest and yourself. I’m sorry you’ve never experienced such support before but we are here now and we won’t stop helping

[main bloom]

I just don’t have any experience with choosing anything,

Or speaking my mind.

[fossil creek]

Thats okay

You don’t need experience

We work it out as we go

[main bloom]

Or saying anything something someone might not like…

[fringe creek]

Be honest, be yourself
Just please
Never turn to self harm, I wen down that road and it wasn’t good
But guess who pulled me out of that path? you your amazing when it comes to this
So please don’t hide your feelings and let us help

[weak vessel]

we all love (platonically) and care for you, @main bloom

[main bloom]

I’d love to let you help. But I don’t know how to. I just can’t process this kind of support, It’s blowing right past me.

[fringe creek]

I mean
I Was never the best at letting people help and look where that got me with you
If you ever need help like this again
My DMs are there, you can talk about your problems with me
Anytime you need
Even if you don’t want me to say anything you can spill any negative emotions in my DMs, I don’t mind it

[fossil creek]

You recognise that you have this support and that these people care for you and try to let that be enough to steer you away from sh right now, I know easier said then done but still try

[main bloom]

I’ve been trying.

[fossil creek]

And I’m so proud of you for that

[weak vessel]

same

[fossil creek]

Sometimes it takes a lot to just try

[main bloom]

Just sometimes it feels lik I’m going insane.

[weak vessel]

what do you see in times like that?

[main bloom]

“See”?

[weak vessel]

Like do you see anything abnormal or just the real world? Like some alice in wonderland type of stuff or smth

[main bloom]

I’m trying to remember.

[weak vessel]

ok

[main bloom]

No, but I will daydream, but I will see, hear, feel, and smell whatever is going on in the daydream.

[weak vessel]

so is that what makes you feel crazy?

[main bloom]

Yes, and depression mixed with pressure.

You don’t have to respond, it’s okay.

I’m about to fall asleep anyways.

Good night/day to you 4 that helped me.

[weak vessel]

gn, I hope you wake up and feel a bit better than today

[fossil creek]

Please sleep well, and if you feel an urge again, dm me if nobody else is responding. I am always happy to help and listen.

[main bloom]

Okay. Thank you.

[fathom yacht]

no timer

js do it

[lavish hemlock]

Sunshine, this is not okay, you cannot play with peoples feelings like this, self harm is not a joke in any form. Please don't do this again, I understand the urges can be overwhelming but the way you displayed it, sounded like a joke. Stay strong and stay clean

[feral needle]

HEY

ONE MINUTE LEFT JUST SAW THIS

[icy rover]

I don't believe that it was a joke. I think she hesitated about doing it because she knows that it's bad, but just had the urge to. And then I understand that she gave a timer. She just hoped that someone would convince her to stop it

[icy rover]

?

[feral needle]

here

so...

is @main bloom ok

[icy rover]

That was 7 hours ago, no?

[feral needle]

wha-

[icy rover]

I assume so with this message

[feral needle]

o shi i was looking at the last two digits

sry i dyslexic

[icy rover]

That's okay

You wantes to help, that's what counts:)

[feral needle]

remind me to never go on a 14 hour flight without sleeping a single minute on it and then stare at a mental health channel

[icy rover]

I'll try lol

[feral needle]

wut time is it for u rn

[icy rover]

Sorry I had to go. It was 12:50 PM there

[feral needle]

o okoe

it was 7:50 for me

[icy rover]

AM or PM?

[feral needle]

pm

gtg

[icy rover]

K, have fun with whatever you're doing now:)

[mortal thorn]

It can cause heart problems? Idk if that’s true I learnt it from house md

[main bloom]

What can cause heart problems???

[mortal thorn]

Cutting urself 😅

I didn’t see the rest of that chat lol the replies weren’t loading so I thought mine was the only one

And then I posted the reply and saw all the others 😭