This obviously isn’t as serious as other peoples but my live lately has genuinely been the dullest thing or made me wanna explode. I start high school this upcoming school year, my mom wants me to take honors classes, I have Volleyball tryouts , and I’m in intermediate choir.
I can’t help but doubt myself in all of this, even though I’ve put in effort to be in it. What if i’m not good enough to be in honors English? I mean I barely read and the summer reading homework is 500 freaking pages.
What if i’m bad in choir? Am I a good enough note taker to be in Honors U.S. history? Can I keep my grades up?
There’s also a sudden expectation for me to get myself to get to school everyday on time next year. There’s just so much new.
People keep asking me if i’m exited or nervous for high school, if i’m happy. And I genuinely don’t know how to reply anymore.
Nowadays it’s always about how I look so much older, how mature I am, how I act like an adult, how I don’t smile, how i’m not happy. But it can never be anything more than ‘just anxiety’ for anyone in my life. Even though it is so much worse.