Hey guys, I needs help coming out to my parents as trans but I dunno hows. I was going to do it’s last Saturday but I gots too scared, so ams thinkings of doing it this saturdays.. and I needs yours helps so I can knows what to says. If you cans helps me, that would be awesome sauce! 
#I needs help coming out to my parents as trans :(
sonic nymph
long kestrel
Before the Conversation
- Choose the right time and place: You should pick a time when everyone is relatively calm and has enough time to talk without interruptions. A quiet, private setting at home is usually best.
- Think about what you want to say: It can help to jot down some key points or even write a letter. This isn't necessarily to read aloud, but to organize your thoughts. You could include:
- How you're feeling: "I've been feeling this way for a while..."
- What being trans means to you: You don't have to give a whole lecture, but a simple explanation can be helpful.
- What you need from their parents: This is crucial. Do you want acceptance, support, help with a new name/pronouns, or to explore medical transition?
- Anticipate questions: Your parents might have a lot of questions, like "How long have you felt this way?" or "Are you sure?" You should think about how you might answer some common ones.
- Consider bringing a support person: If there's another trusted family member (like an aunt or older sibling) or even a friend, that could offer support and help facilitate the conversation.
- Have resources ready: It might be helpful to have some reliable websites or organizations about transgender identities that your parents can look at later if they want more information.
During the Conversation
- Start with "I" statements: You should focus on your own feelings and experiences, like "I feel like myself when I..." rather than "You should understand..."
- Be patient: Your parents might be surprised, confused, or even upset at first. This is a lot for them to process, and their initial reaction might not be their final one. You should give them time and space.
- Be open to questions (within reason): You should answer questions honestly but also feel empowered to say, "I don't know yet" or "That's something I'm still figuring out." You don't owe anyone every detail of your identity.
- Set boundaries if needed: If the conversation becomes unhelpful or even harmful, you have the right to say, "I need a break from this conversation right now" and revisit it later.
After the Conversation
- Have a plan for self-care: This will be an emotionally draining experience. You can have something comforting planned for afterward, whether it's watching a favorite movie, listening to music, or spending time with supportive friends.
- Remember your worth: Regardless of how your parents react, your identity is valid and important.
@sonic nymph Sorry, I know it's alot to read, I just woke up 😭🙏🏻
sonic nymph
Thanks you so much! 
long kestrel
Anytime!!! 
dull sparrow
Hey guys, I needs help coming out to my parents as trans but I dunno hows. I was...
lol i remember my coming out to my mom as a trans male and she thought it was a bad thing cauz i was crying out of panic (shes not transphobic she just worry too much for me)
ocean pollen
Many parents believe that if their child is queer, they may have failed as a parent. Let them know that they haven’t failed and that you still love them.
wispy drift
I came out as trans to my mother when I was five, how? I just told her I was a boy, she told me it was ridiculous, that I was just hanging out too much with my guy friends, I had no friends that were girls.
When I turned seven, I told her again that something was wrong inside me, I didn't want to keep my hair long, I kept trying to pee while standing on the toilet (that never ended well) and overall wanted to go in the woods to hunt and dirt bike with the boys.
She didn't understand and kept telling me it was because I had low self esteem, that once my breasts came through, I would be over it.
Surprise surprise, I turned 13 and my breast came through badly, I don't mean they were small, I grew well, with cancer inside. I told the doctors they were more than welcome to take them out, my mom freaked out (her mother died of breast cancer when she was nine) and did everything to salvage my breast as well as me.
.
Fast forward to 15, I am cancer free, curvy and sick of it, I told her I was a man and wanted to get my meds for transitioning, to which she told me no, she was convinced that i would regret it, that the irreversible effects would worsen my already to the floor mental health, eventually, we had a pretty big argument and I was forced to choose to run away or get her to agree that I move out.
I did, she helped me move out and I lived my life only as a man online because legally I wasn't allowed to transition without the consent of my parents. and when I turned 19, I began my transition, my mother was shocked, while my stepfather believed I was doing a mistake (he was pretty LGBTQ phobic at the time) not even 3 months after I began transitioning, my mother calls me ecstatic about my brother finally finding his place in the world.
Mind you, I have no brother.
I have a little girly girl sister who wants to be a singer and is obsessed with Dora and pink. Turns out she came out as trans the day after I did, no signs no nothing, that's how my mother began to accept me for who I was, because of the favorite in the family, who mind you, six months later, when at 16 she was told mom agreed to transition her, she declined because it would change her perfect curvy girl body, she now identifies as a wolf and girl.
So honestly, I hope your story went better than mine.
I am 23 now, will get chest surgery this autumn and bottom surgery in a few years, I can tell you that my mother and sister are out of my life, I am married to the woman who got me through these though times, she is straight, yet always loved me and wants to help me achieve what I always needed. So things get better, eventually.