Ok so I have a problem. I’m dating this girl that I don’t like romantically. My friends made me date her because she liked me and she was desperate to date someone. I’m gay, I like boys. I don’t know how to break up with her without breaking her heart. She thinks I’m bisexual. My friends all said “oh you’re gonna deny that you like her and then you’ll realize you’re bisexual.” I genuinely don’t like girls romantically. How do I break up with her?
#sexuality crisis ft. Dating
median ember
silver thunder
If they were pushing you to date her that much, then they aren't really your friends. A true friend would respect your boundaries and let you choose who you want to date. I don't know how much I can help you with breaking up with her, as I have never had that deep of a relationship, but it might be best to just be upfront with her about it.
oak shell
Hey, it sounds like an emotionally exhausting situation.
I’m going to offer some advice, hopefully it helps you.
I have a few things to point out:
• Why are your friends calling the shots in your romantic life? It’s your romantic life. I don’t understand why they made you date her. Sure, she wants to date someone (which is something she needs to unpack on her own), but your needs are also important. I don’t think it’s fair of them to make you enter a relationship just for her sake. They don’t get a say in who you choose to date or why.
• Why are your friends the ones dictating how you should feel and your sexuality? That’s none of their business.
I’m not going to lie, there is no way for you to break up with her without hurting her. You need to accept that before you talk to her about it. Once you can do that, you can explain to her that it’s not about her personally, but about your sexuality. You can’t force someone to like someone. That’s not how it works. Plus, wouldn’t she want to be with someone that’s romantically attracted to her? I think she deserves someone that’ll love her in all the colors that she is. You’re not able to do that, but that doesn’t mean she’s unlovable and can’t receive that from someone else.
silver thunder
I can't emphasize this enough: True friends will always respect your personal boundaries and not basically force you to do something you don't want to do in order to maintain your friendship with them.
oak shell
I agree with Elijah. Real friends care about your emotional and mental well-being. And have enough empathy to not force you into anything you don’t want to do.
spark drift
Do you tell them your fully gay or do they think your Bisexual and faking?