Well, you are certainly not alone in your age. I am 30 myself and i just started to figure things out aswell. I mean, i do have other reasons for why i do it just now, but yeah. I had to learn it myself first, but there is nothing wrong with figuring this stuff out with 30 or even older.
#30+ and only just now realizing some things about myself
twilit lichen
twilit lichen
Hm. In my opinion, to really get the answer that you (myself included lol) seek, just try out things. Like, buy feminine clothes and try them on, see how you feel in them. Is that something you like to see on yourself, do you feel comfortable wearing them? Is that something that makes you happy? That stuff basically. I know how lost you may feel, but you gotta start somewhere, you know? Unfortunately there is no clear path for this, and i had to learn it the hard way first. Everyone seems to feel differently about this and that's totally normal i guess.
What could help you on your way though is someone you trust and can rely on. Someone, you can talk to about this stuff. In my case, it's my younger trans brother, which i came out to recently. I guess the older you get, the harder it becomes to accept, that you may actually want to transform. I mean, you've been male for over 30 years, just like me. There may be different reasons to why we figure this stuff out later then most others. But i say, better late then never. There is still time left to live your life, the way you might always wanted.
(I am curious, but what is that button test thing you mentioned?)