I need help TW ig

[cobalt patrol]

I really need help, i think my gf has killed herself and i really want to fucking follow her, i love her so much. The only problem is my brother, i cant leave him home alone

[formal cove]

Do you have any definitive proof that this has occurred?

[cobalt patrol]

Shes not answering my texts or dms and said she was suffocating and refused to elaborate

Im fucking shaky

She was saying earlier how shes in a really dark place, its been a while and ik shes not asleep

[formal cove]

Have you ever communicated with her parents?

[cobalt patrol]

I havent spoken to her parents

I dont know them

[formal cove]

Ok, that’s unfortunate. Do you know anyone else who knows her?

[cobalt patrol]

Yes but hes her very shitty ex

[formal cove]

Also I should probably send this #🆘｜crisis-help-channels

[formal cove]

So not someone who was in active communication with her.

[cobalt patrol]

Yeah

[formal cove]

Hmm, I see

[cobalt patrol]

I cant speak to anyone about this irl, my mums homophobic and would be mad about me keeping contact with her

[formal cove]

If she attempted but didn’t succeed or was suggestive about it to others, there’s a chance she was put in a psych ward or mental hospital which would prevent her from being able to communicate

I had that happen to friend of mine for like two weeks and it got really scary.

[cobalt patrol]

Shit

But what if she did it

My brother walked in on me hurting myself, i feel so bad

[formal cove]

If she succeeded, then it means what you think it means. But please, before you do anything just think, do you think it would make her happy to see you suffer her same fate?

[cobalt patrol]

No

But i could see her, if theres an afterlife

[formal cove]

Are you religious?

[cobalt patrol]

No

But im not against gods n shit

[formal cove]

Do you, and be honest with yourself, believe there is an afterlife? Or do you just wish it?

[cobalt patrol]

I want there to be, so i could see her

Or if shes not dead i could watch over her

[formal cove]

On that thought, think about how worried you are for her now. If she’s alive, do you want her to face that same overwhelming concern and loss?

[cobalt patrol]

I would love for her to find someone.. shed be sad for a bit

[formal cove]

And would she not want the same for you?

If she has truly left?

[cobalt patrol]

She would, but i want to see her

This life has nothing to fucking offer

[formal cove]

It may have nothing to offer as of this moment, but the fact of the matter is changes can come. Nothing stays the same forever, the entirety of history proves that point. Things are ever changing, so just because things are how they are now doesn’t mean they will be forever. No one can predict the future, but the past has occurred, and if the past is anything to go on, it tells us that if we keep going forward, things eventually will change.

You wish for an afterlife, but I again ask you, do you believe in the afterlife?

[cobalt patrol]

No, i believe in spirits/ghosts but idk if theres an afterlife, sometimes i think there is but othertimes i dont

[formal cove]

With that in mind, ending it is just that, the end. It’s unlikely there’s anything after, meaning you are choosing for your life’s final experience to be one of misery. You won’t even get that feeling of relief because there won’t be any of you left to be relieved. If you die, it sounds like it’s only banking on a slim chance of an afterlife life. Compound that with whether or not your girlfriend has even passed, and it’s EXTREMELY unlikely the desired outcome of seeing her in an afterlife will be.

[cobalt patrol]

True..

[formal cove]

But also, it sounds like there’s at least one other person in your life you care for.

What about him?

Do you want him to feel this sense of loss as well?

[cobalt patrol]

He'll live, hes too young to understand

[formal cove]

Maybe now, but he won’t always be. There will be the day when he wonders what happened to his sister, and that will be a day full of sorrow. Do you really think he’ll be fine knowing that he was one of the final things you lived for. There’s a thing called survivors guilt, and there’s a strong chance he’ll get that. Why couldn’t he help, how could he have prevented it, the very same things you ask yourself now

If everyone that loses someone ends it themselves, there is never an end to the loss.

[cobalt patrol]

True..

It just hurts so much

[formal cove]

I’m know, (not truly, I can never truly know how you feel), and the fact of the matter is, it will hurt. It will hurt so, so extremely much. But like the worst of injures, there is a chance to heal. At the same time, to recover does not mean to forget. Just as cuts leave scars of reminders, you can remember those that you lost even if things get better. This may sound somewhat cheesy, but try living for her. She cares about you dearly, if she’s still alive, she will go through hell and back again to see you again, and if she had truly passed on, you hold her memories. Preserve her, keep what parts of her you can in this world. She should not be forgotten, and as long as the one who cared and was cared for so dearly is alive, so too is she in a sense. If you can’t bring yourself to survive for yourself, for your family, for those that care like me, then survive for her.

[cobalt patrol]

Thank you, im sorry

[formal cove]

You have nothing to be sorry for.

[cobalt patrol]

Thank you, so fucking much

[formal cove]

Please, keep me updated and let me know whenever I can be of assistance.

[cobalt patrol]

Okay, ill try

[formal cove]

Please take care of yourself, for her sake, for whether alive or in spirit, she will always be with you.

[cobalt patrol]

I hope so

[formal cove]

Thank you, thank you so so much.

[cobalt patrol]

Why are you thanking me?

[formal cove]

I can’t quite describe it, I guess I’m just thankful that you allowed me to speak my piece . It always makes me happy when I can help others, or am at least allowed to try.

[novel flax]

I hope the best for you🫂 take a viral hug you seem like you need one

[cobalt patrol]

Thanks

[cobalt patrol]

Oh, okay ❤️ im feeling better today, thank you

[novel flax]

That´s good to hear i hope it keeps going in that direction

[cobalt patrol]

Thanks ❤️

[novel flax]

If you do not mind me asking, how is she doing? (If you don´t wanna answer pls don´t feel pressured to, i´m just asking but if you don´t wanna share that´s completely fine)

[cobalt patrol]

Shes alive thank fuck, and im talking to her now

Thank you for everything, both of you

[formal cove]

I’m so happy to hear that!

[cobalt patrol]

Tyyy