I feel like a bad bf

[scenic mirage]

I just started being with a wonderful amazing person, but I feel like I don't put effort, even though I make gifts and always think about them, I don't feel enough at all, I love my bf so much but I'm scared if I'll be left

[mighty sparrow]

Why are you scared? U love him

[scenic mirage]

I don't know, I'm just really afraid of him leaving me for a little mistake, I have really bad depression from my last ex who groomed me and stuff and was way older then me, they were abusive as well so I fear if I do something wrong my bf would get upset, though he has never done such thing so I feel stupid for worrying

[mighty sparrow]

Ur just scared of the future cus of the past on other words right?

[scenic mirage]

Yeah, my ex messed me up real bad 😢

[mighty sparrow]

Oh I’m so sorry to hear that have u tried fixing urself by having a good routine etc?

[scenic mirage]

Honestly all I do is wake up and do nothing in my bed because I'm too tired but I do shower and clean myself daily

Me and my best friend also like to make fun of my ex ig and that helps me

[mighty sparrow]

Alr lol

[mighty sparrow]

But I mean with a good routine like mental health care like do u eat/drink enough etc yk what I mean?

[scenic mirage]

Ohhhh, yeah kinda!! Sometimes I eat and stuff

[mighty sparrow]

Sometimes is not good it should be daily

Like u sleep daily

[scenic mirage]

I barley sleep sometimes idk I'm trying to sleep more tho

[mighty sparrow]

Oh

U should sleep/eat/drink more

Cus if u care about all that u will feel better soon

[scarlet leaf]

hey, you’re in no way a bad bf, i understand that your past experiences have made u scared, i also am scared to lose the person i care about the most.. but trust me, he loves you, what you’re describing sounds like fear of separation caused by past experiences, which helps to deal with that is that you could talk to your bf abt it to show him how much you care about him and that you’re scared to lose him, what also really helps is focusing on your emotions, like journaling or meditations for mindfulness might help, in the worst case, when it doesn’t get any better you should definitely get some professional help/maybe reach out to some hotline for more professional support and advice

[scenic mirage]

I'm gonna try!!! Thanks tho, I'll do my best I can to help myself

[mighty sparrow]

Oh and don’t feel afraid or scared of what was in ur past im sure ur a great bf for him and doing the best u can u can never be the best but don’t let urself down by the past

[scenic mirage]

I can't exactly get help because I'm still young and my family will go insane on me if I ever said about the grooming, but I am about to call out on my ex tho!! And thank you for the reassurance, I'm sorry if I don't respond the best I'm bad at responding to comfort

[mighty sparrow]

Okay tysm

[scenic mirage]

Thank you, alot I appreciate both of your guys effort!!

[mighty sparrow]

I understand ur situation rlly good tbh and tysm for talking in here

[scenic mirage]

NPP!! All j can really do rn is vent online lol but it's fine I'll get better soon

[scarlet leaf]

i totally understand that, you should firstly take care of yourself and if it doesn’t help, then an anonymous help hotline could help maybe? you wouldn’t have to talk to your family about it and you could get some more professional support<3

[scenic mirage]

I'm sorry that you also go through fear of ppl leaving, I hope u heal man!!

[mighty sparrow]

U should appreciate only hers cus she writes more

[scarlet leaf]

and if you ever need something feel free to dm me and i’ll try to help !

[scenic mirage]

Nah I appreciate both of you guys, it doesn't matter you both are making an effort to help

[scenic mirage]

I'll do it when I'm ready, it's still hard since the ex thing is recent

[mighty sparrow]

Oh I didn’t know I’m sorry to hear that

[scarlet leaf]

oh okay, yes i understand that, take your time and do whatever you think is best for you !

[scenic mirage]

Thank you both!! I'm gonna stop here because I feel better now abt the reassurance!! I'm happy to have help though, I'll be here for you both as well!!

[scenic mirage]

It's fine I'm healing soon lol

[mighty sparrow]

W lol

[scarlet leaf]

thank you ! hopefully you’re gonna feel better soon and my dms are always open if you need anything <3

[scenic mirage]

Thank u both again!! Cya dudes!! 🐛

[mighty sparrow]

Alr mate gave a good day/life and a great time

[honest solar]

from what im hearing you have a trauma from your ex who did horrible stuff that should not ever be a thing to happen to anyone im so sorry for you make sure you call out your ex to cops you dont even need to tell your relatives ofc thats a good thing but if thats too hard just tell the police for now so that that ex gets what he deserves for the rest seek a good form of theraphy by looking online what type of theraphy supports your problems and just know if your partner does do bad stuff to you that you do not like either leave him or tell him about it if it wasnt too bad and just know any good partner would let you do whatever you want and any bad situations that you might cause they should not act on and just forgive you and if they dont then its probably a bad partner even if you really like them (i know your feeling better already and stuff atleast for now but i just wanted to add my part and my advice)

sorry for no like punctuation i just dont wanna do it for such a long msg