I just sometimes can’t take. No matter how hard I’ve tried, no matter how hard I help. There’s only so much I can do. Eventually, some people close their ears, block off communication, and sometimes even worse. Can I really help if the feeling of failure always looms so close in mind? I guess I partially help people because it helps me cope with my own issues. While each success brings me a boost, and failure just sends me spiraling back in to the dark. I sometimes wonder why I even try in the first place when I can’t even get ahold of myself.
#The paradox of helping
gilded lynx
viscid condor
I know this doesn't make everything better, but I just want to say that you're an amazing person for caring so much. What you're trying to do is incredibly astoundingly hard, and although I'm new here I am certain you've made a massive impact on the people you've helped. You ultimately can't control other people. No matter how hard you try, no matter how much you care and how much you desperately hope, sometimes there's truly nothing you can do. And that's so so hard to deal with sometimes, and as you've said it has an impact on you as well.
You have to remember though, your life matters just as much as theirs do, you're just as deserving of help as anyone else. Taking a break from things, or reducing it a bit, is not only reasonable, it's healthy. You are not responsible for what other people do, and you not being here to help does not make you responsible for anything that happens to them. You have a life, and that life is just as important!. So please, protect yourself too, look out for yourself and do what's necessary to keep yourself healthy. There will always be people that need help, you will never be able to help everyone. But there is one person that you can help that will never go away, and that's yourself.