It's really weird how I try to kill myself but fail, I do it for really little reasons, and big reasons every year of a month I feel cold, unpassive and making my suicidal risk become high, because of that one time this year I digged a knife in my thigh (not deep into my skin so no blood). The little reasons are when I get ignored, someone being forceful to me or replacing me I just never gave up on life for some reason and I don't know why, I wish I could though but then when I say that I look back at good memories. I need someone to talk to normal Therapists do not work.
#{TW Suicide SH} I sometimes feel suicidal and I hurt myself
forest apex
limber plank
The reason you don’t do it is your body wants to survive. In other words, because you want to survive
forest apex
Oh...but I damage it that makes no sense.
limber plank
Damaging it doesn’t end everything, doesn’t stop the future from happening, doesn’t end any thoughts you have and will have, end all and any feeling, etc.
forest apex
Thank you! ❤
limber plank
Try and stay alive. It can be hard but yeah, mathematically it makes more sense than the alternative.
That’s at least what I think to help myself in troubling times.
Then again, that’s just because I rely heavily on logic
forest apex
Oh, but I can't help it because I have to see my dad every year it's so bad I even go to the mental hospital because of my suicidal thoughts, I should've never told people.
limber plank
I take it stuff isn’t good with your dad?
limber plank
Fuck, I’m sorry about that. It disgusts me that a parent can do such things to their own child.
forest apex
He even abuses my little siblings they're just 7-9
limber plank
What even goes through his mind?
limber plank
Are your parents divorced?
limber plank
Do you have to visit your dad because of custody stuff?
limber plank
Dang, that sucks majorly.
forest apex
But now in the Summer I see him for a month and Christmas is a week
limber plank
Was any of his abuse towards you ever reported?
forest apex
Yes
limber plank
Or your sibling?
forest apex
Both
limber plank
And he was still permitted partial custody?
forest apex
Kinda
red geode
{TW Suicide} I sometimes feel suicidal and I hurt myself
red geode
{TW Suicide SH} I sometimes feel suicidal and I hurt myself
limber plank
Kinda?