I think I might get dropped from the Psychology Course.

[unkempt cosmos]

I took Psychology as my College Course, and it's only the 1st year of college for me but it was absolute hell. I was already expecting it to be bad but I didn't expect it to be worse than what I thought. Our professor is giving like intimidating vibes whenever he enters the room (no offense) and he's brutal when giving grades (and I've heard from a senior of mine that he's sexist apparently 😭). I've done decent during the sessions, I pass my activities in time, although my scores in quizzes aren't that great just mediocre. It's now almost the Finals and I'm already shaking and anxious about the upcoming future. Me, along with a couple of others who also have failing grades were given a remedial to increase our grades although he said that it's not a guarantee if we will still be able to pass which made me really REALLY scared because I love Psychology, it's really interesting to study about, but hearing that I might not be able to make it to 2nd year, my hope is slowly going down. I'm trying to keep it positive but I don't know if I can keep the facade in. My mental health is slowly getting bad every time, I'm scared to open it up to my parents because every time I get emotional in front of them, they seem to judge me and say stuff like "kaya mo na, ah" ("you can do it" in english) or "indi ka bobo, tamad lang" ("you're not dumb, just lazy" in english), and the blame is already shifted towards me for being a lazy ||fuck||. I'm already trying my best to survive this but I'm slowly slipping away from it. One wrong move, and I'm already kicked from the course because of 1 subject. Another reason why I'm scared is because I don't want to disappoint. My brother is paying for my tuition and it would be bad if he finds out that I'm failing. I already had multiple breakdowns about this... What do I do...? I'm so tired... 😞

[simple plover]

I felt every word you said, and honestly? You’re incredibly strong for still holding on through all this. College can already be brutal, but when it’s something you actually love — like Psychology — it hits harder. It’s not just about grades, it’s about feeling like your dream is slipping through your fingers. That fear? That anxiety? It’s valid.

What sucks even more is when the people you expect to help, like your family, just don’t get it. ‘Kaya mo na, ah’ is easy to say when they’re not the ones in your shoes. You're not lazy. You're not weak. You’re burnt out, overwhelmed, and trying so damn hard — and that already says a lot about you.

If no one else has said it: I’m proud of you. For fighting, even when you’re tired. For caring, even when it hurts. You deserve support, not shame. And whatever happens with this subject, it doesn’t define your worth, or your future. You’re not alone in this. If you ever wanna vent or just need someone to sit in the dark with you for a bit — I’m around. DMs open, no judgment.

[true abyss]

Yeah take some rest buddy

Gotta try your best

And you arent your best rn

So take some rest

[unkempt cosmos]

Yeah I took a rest for awhile, and I plan on studying prelim to midterm lessons to prepare for the remedial the whole night and for finals too because the coverage is all of the lessons covered from prelims to finals, thanks for the kind words tho i feel happy

[simple plover]

[unkempt cosmos]

I'll just have to work hard in the finals and the remedial because it was recommended that I put my all in there. I'll just update about what happens next month, wish me luck ackk

[true abyss]

good luck, work hard but not too hard

[unkempt cosmos]

thankies